Manchester City v Bayern Munich: Champions League quarter-final, first leg – live | Champions League

45 min “The only two soccer players I’ve ever met in the flesh,” begins Tony Hughes, “were a) Pasquale Bruno in Edinburgh during his stint with Hearts in the 1990s and b) Jaap Stam in a COVID-deserted downtown Cincinnati, in that honeymoon period just after he signed on as FC Cincinnati coach but before he lost almost every game. I approached neither.”

Is Pasquale Bruno the fella who completely lost it when he was sent off for Torino against Juventus in 1991?

Edit: oh yes it was.

Updated at 15.45 EDT

35 min Sommer misses the resulting corner, with Haaland unable to turn the ball on target from a very tight angle beyond the far post. Then Bayern break and Kimmich has a low shot blocked by… Grealish.

I can’t keep up with this.

Updated at 15.36 EDT

34 min: Amazing save from Sommer! This is glorious drama. De Bruyne’s deflected cross from the right bounces so awkwardly that Upamecano runs straight past the ball at trhe near post. Sommer charges from his line to take it off Grealish’s head, but he can only punch it straight to Gundogan, following up 10 yards out.

Gundogan hits a first-time volley towards goal, but Sommer – by now on the ground and ostensibly out of the game – sticks out his left leg to make a remarkable reaction save.

Updated at 15.49 EDT

33 min We talk all the time about fine margins and details, and the 90 seconds before the City goal was another example. Jamal Musiala would have given Bayern the lead but for an outstanding block from Ruben Dias. Moments later, Musiala was guilty of a slightly woolly challenge, but one that would have gone unpunished 49 times out of 50. This was the 50th.

Updated at 15.34 EDT

33 min “Given there was a talk about tactical overthoughts, selling players at their peak or after it, former Dutch defenders that played for Man United and full-backs, I decided to melt it all into one,” says Admir Pajic. “One of the craziest tactical ideas that I can recall of was Roberto Mancini playing Jaap Stam as marauding RB at Lazio. The best part is, Stam didn’t look out of the place at all. You can only imagine how the opposite number felt when he saw the Dutch giant marauding down his side.”

Or just marauding towards you full stop.

Updated at 15.33 EDT

I’m not sure even Rodri can believe this. He was found by a square pass Bernardo 25 yards from goal, with Musiala on his shoulder. Rodri turned away from him and then, with nothing else on, shaped a glorious left-footed curler that nestled in the far top corner. Pick that out.

Updated at 15.55 EDT

26 min: Great defending by Dias! Kimmich robs De Bruyne high up the field and finds Sane. He evades Akanji, gets to the byline and cuts the ball back to Musiala, unmarked on the edge of the area. Musiala takes a touch and rifles a low shot that is blocked by the outstretched right leg of Dias. I’m pretty sure that was going in because Ederson was wrong-footed.

Updated at 15.27 EDT

22 min: Chance for Haaland! Lovely play by City. They win the ball high up the field, with Gundogan threading a good, straight pass into Grealish on the edge of the area. He flicks it back outside to the unmarked Haaland, who sidefoots tamely straight at Sommer from the edge of the area. He had time to take a touch there.

Updated at 15.23 EDT

21 min “At the risk of invoking Silvio Dante invoking Al Pacino, this is the sort of CL game that pulls you back in isn’t it?” says David Hopkins. “Yes it’s basically a lopsided magic money tree for the top clubs, but it’s also two monster teams going at it like billy-o!”

Yeah, nicely put. Pretty much everything about modern football is soul-crushing, apart from the actual football. And by that I don’t mean VAR or diving or timewasting, I mean the actual football. You know, the bit that fits my half-arsed narrative!

Updated at 15.21 EDT